Essays: Like a!

Taken from  high school essays:

Collected by English teachers for their own amusement. Some of these kids may have bright futures as humor or horror writers. What do you think?

Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a ThighMaster.

His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.